Giving Tate what he deserves

This past week has been rough to say the least. I have been debating on whether or not to set up a place for Tate. I know youve heard me say I cant set up a crib so I decided to set up the pack n' play. I have put blankets and the stuffed animals Kevin and Allie Faith are going to give their baby brother in there. I put a quote up that my sweet in laws gave us when we first found out Tate diagnoses. It says "Everyday Hold A Possibility Of A Miracle". Its so true!

I know some will think that Im setting myself up for disappointment BUT I feel Tate deserves a mommy and daddy that have hope of healing! Tate deserves so much more than I have been giving! So I have set up a place to have if we bring him home even if its for a short time! Thats what Im Hoping and PRAYING for! That I have time with my son!

waiting for a picture

Yesterday we had our maternity photo shoot with the most talented photographer in the world, Natalie Spargo.

Sez Me Photography

I will cherish these pictures for the rest of my life.

So many emotions ran through me while we were doing this shoot!

I love them all!!!

The man who holds me together!

One of my absolute favorites!

Kevin loves Talking to Tate!

Almost lost it here. Such a blessing to carry our little guy! He has made me a better person!

I have no words. Natalie knows how to capture the moment!

 Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” Matthew 19:26 

Making a Birth Plan

Making a birth plan is harder than I ever imagined it would be.

I have a pen and a blank page, trying so desperately to come up with the "right" decisions for Tates little life.

I have looked online for other tri-18 families birth plans.

After talking to UAB, I feel they are going to do whatever we choose is right.

BUT I keep coming back to a blank page.

How do I plan for this?

How do I make these decisions?

What if I make the wrong choices?

I know with the Lords help I can do it, but let me be human for a minute and say

I CANT DO THIS!!!

Today our worst fear came true

Today our worst fear came true.

Our son has been diagnosed with Trisomy 18.
 There are no words to express what I feel right now. Its hard to imagine Tate moving, kicking and squirming around that he, in a medical standpoint, will have no chance of survival outside the womb. I will praise and worship the One who has the power to heal my son!

While David and I cried on the kitchen floor, we I feel the presence of The Lord telling us to simply trust Him. ....and that is what we will do. 
I dont know what each day will hold much less this minute. All I know is....

"God is our refuge and strength,
an ever-present help in trouble."
Psalm 46:1