He shot His arrows deep into my heart. The thought of my suffering and hopelessness is bitter beyond words. I will never forget this awful time, as I grieve over my loss. YET I DARE to Hope when I remember this: The UNFAILING Love of the Lord NEVER ENDS! By His mercies we have been kept from complete destruction.
Lamentations 3:13,19-22

Monday, May 2, 2011

35 Weeks!

35 weeks today!
I have learned so much about the Lord and myself during this time. It unlike anything Ive ever felt!  Im so thankful to have made it this far into pregnancy! This has been a good week! Praise the Lord!
Im trying to have a new outlook on this situation.
1 Peter 5:7 says:
Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
I feel so much peace when I read that verse. Im trying very hard to cast my anxiety on HIM. Im trying to realize that I cant do this alone! I know the Lord is with us as we walk this difficult path. I cant change or predict how it will unfold, I can only trust the Lord do what He feels is right! As a mother its hard to let go of some things you feel you can do better for your kids because you love them more than anyone else. The Lord love us more than we can ever imagine. He will do what He feels is right and what He feels is best for our family! Today I feel the weight of His grace and comfort! 

2-Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.
The God of All Comfort
3-Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, 4-who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. 5-For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows. 6-If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which produces in you patient endurance of the same sufferings we suffer. 7-And our hope for you is firm, because we know that just as you share in our sufferings, so also you share in our comfort.
2 Corinthians 1 2-7

"I tell you the truth, if anyone says to this mountain, 'Go, throw yourself into the sea,' and does not doubt in his heart but believes that what he says will happen, it will be done for him.
-Mark 11:23

 if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."
Matthew 17:20


Cathy said...

Dear Cricket,
You have a beautiful family! I know you have met with lots of people regarding what to expect with T18, but I would like to add something. I have worked in a NICU for 26 years and met many babies with T18 (those that survive birth). Most have gone home for at least a few days, usually with tube feedings and sometimes with some oxygen. We also arrange for a photographer from Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep to be present to do bereavement photography. I hope there is a pediatric hospice program in your city that can provide support to you medically and emotionally as well. I can tell that you have researched this very thoroughly, but go ahead and buy a few preemie outfits and hats, some diapers and bottles because you may use them. From experience my own loss, it doesn't hurt any less to have nothing to put away.
Congratulations on having this wonderful little man.

Cricket said...

Thank you so much for the sweet words of encouragement. It helps moret than I can say. We have a family friend who is a professional photographer, she is going to be there to take every picture possible. I know there will be so much going on and I dont think I will be able to remember everything without the pictures. We also have a great grief counselor. Two actually. They have been so helpful. Im praying we get to bring him home. Just so I can feel I had time with him and that he gets time with us. Thank you agian for taking the time to write me.

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